Faith Abounding

I don't do this often because this is a fitness & lifestyle blog and I just like to keep my topics relevant. However, I think that having a spiritual fit and healthy lifestyle is so essential to overall health. I just wanted to share my faith a little today. 

I've grown up in the church so faith has never been an issue for me. I seriously was in the church since I was born and my family was super active. We went Sunday morning and evening and Wednesday evenings. I have so many memories growing up in youth group, and I plan to do the same for my children. However, when I went to college was when I really figured out what faith meant for me. 

I think that's when we basically figure out what life means to us. We are constantly influenced by our parent's views, opinions, and politics that I think it takes some time to really figure out who we are as individuals. I think that our families are going to always have an influence on those decisions that we finally end up with and most likely will align just perfectly but I think it's so important to establish our own. My political views and my exact approach to religion is not the same as my moms and THAT'S OKAY! 

I like to always say that I grew up thinking about "Jesus in a box". I love Jesus. I am "saved" but you don't want to be one of those "Jesus freaks". Like, don't be weird Katie. You gotta keep it contained because then you just get weird. It's not culturally accepted and you can't be the cool kid if you are also the Jesus lover. At least that's how it felt sometimes by my peers.

This has slowly evolved over time. I've had to learn that what makes me, is just what makes me. It may not be what makes someone else happy and what makes them tick. I certainly know that lifting weights and having a feminine but muscular body is looked down upon in society. It's just "too much" so "don't be weird Katie". We are told as strong women to sit down and get quiet about who we really are so that we can be more accepted. {Side Note: I am NOT feminist and do not feel like I'm targeted as a woman. I just think society can be hard on women so we have to learn to be ourselves.}

I have wavered with my faith through the years, and not in the believing way. I just simply forgot about Jesus. He just wasn't on my to do list. I had to become a SOMEBODY whether that meant in fitness or in pharmacy school. This life was about ME and how accomplished I could be. I'm sorry Jesus, I just can't come to church. I really need to study. 

I think that it wasn't until this past year in New York City that I truly learned what it looks like to walk the walk and talk the talk. Like, put me down for the weird card if that's what you want to call it. My box hath burst open. My Jesus is worn on my sleeve. For me, it means being in the word every single day and committing to more and more of that every single day. For me, that means engaging in community almost daily with believers. I think it has been absolutely INTEGRAL in my growth. My friends are my community group. We do everything in life together, and we meet on Wednesdays to hash out what the words in the Bible mean to us individually and how to live that out. 

I always say that New York City is a very secular city so if you decide that you love Jesus, then you are either all in or nothing at all. Thankfully, I met people that are all in and taught me what that looks like. I have such amazing leaders around me in my friend group that pray with me, fast with me (yea I'm really not good at that), and encourage me. Even when I don't want to hear it, they speak truth from the Bible into me. 

I've found this has also led me into a season of doubt and grieving within myself. Like, DO YOU EVEN JESUS KATIE? I'm kidding, but I've felt so much guilt as to the way that I live out my life. I've felt like I can't ever be what these people are to me. And I've felt like I'm truly not living out the purpose that God has for my life. So, I've had to seek him for that. Every. Single. Day. And I still don't know. I know that I make daily decisions and that God's plan is perfect and will align with my decisions but I have to seek to point it all back to him to make sure I'm finding that perfect plan. It's very vague. I'm well aware, but I'm seeking it. 

I know I seem bold on this blog, but I'm definitely not in person. I'm very meek for lack of a better word. I cower in defending my God because again, I don't want to be the weird girl. It all goes back to being accepted. It all goes back to being confident in WHO YOU ARE, so I continue to work on that in other avenues of my life. It's fun to hash it out as I grow in adulthood.

I don't want this blog to be a self help, but just simply my story and how I hope to live my life. I want to live a life so abundantly in Jesus that when people look at me, they see nothing else. I don't think I'm there yet, but I'll continue striving and growing maturity in my faith. I want to look to my future, and not worry because with worry means that I don't trust the infinitely perfect plan Jesus has for my life. And in the end, I do believe that. With all of my heart. 

So, there you have it. This is my heart on my sleeve. Thanks for joining my journey. 

With love and Jesus, 

Katie


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