The Problem with Purpose

Ever feel like all anyone ever talks about is purpose and how we need to be fulfilling it? Yea, me too. It's exhausting. If you aren't feeling happy with your current situation, then just quit and find the job of your dreams right? I think that I was literally one of those people, and this was during a time that it made sense. I was succeeding in the job of my dreams, which was when I was doing blogging full time. You may ask, "but Katie, didn't you quit that full time?" And the answer would be "Yep, sure did. What was I thinking?" 

Of course I could go into all of the reasons that I did it, and I do know those full well. I know that the decision that I made was not taken lightly and that I maturely thought it through. I didn't just take a leap of faith out of nowhere. I had been considering it for a long time and a lot of things came into play, but I also let things get into my head that should not have and now that I'm separated from all the noise, I realize what an incredible opportunity that had been given to me and I walked away. I literally used to live in New York City on the Hudson looking at the Statue of Liberty from my living room window as a full time blogger working at home doing really well financially, and now I'm in Shelby working an 8-5. I'm trying yall. I'm trying to see this silver lining purpose but just keeping.it.real. HA! 

A few months ago, I actually probably would have told you that I was fulfilling some form of greater purpose to which I'm sure I am, and the job that I have now kind of landed in my lap and the timing couldn't have been more perfect. When I asked those that had "quit social media" if they were glad that they did it, I pretty much got a resounding YES! It gave me the confidence that I needed to take the step moving in that direction. I've had a few people ask me this question and while I recognize all the good and the bad, I like to let them know that you have to deal with A LOT of regret and working through that and continually letting yourself know that the decision that you made was for good reason and that you know for sure in your heart that it's right for you. 

The problem with purpose is that things can't get mundane or things can't have a little bump in the road before we want to jump ship searching for our purpose. Maybe that's just me though? I think that there is a difference between praying about a situation and really getting clarity and trusting yourself as you seek your greater purpose. I'm not saying that we don't all have a purpose, but I think that we also can make ourselves purposeful in any situation (job or life) that we land ourselves in. We end up being less satisfied because we are always striving. Purpose is not finite. It's ever changing, and ever reaching further.

The age of social media has everyone searching for the ways in which they are going to change the world, and some people are able to fight this but others with personalities such as mine get overwhelmed and want to actually attempt to do so. When you recognize that the day to day is NOT saving the world or building some massive business of your own and that going to a 8-5 is okay and that you can make yourself purposeful right where you are, then you begin to relax into it.

I wrote an instagram post last week about just dealing with where I'm at and not being happy with it, and I think it's okay to say these things. I think that it's okay to admit when we are struggling and so that's something that I've had to deal with. I've had to once again sit back and think "What in the world did I do that for? It was rash, emotional, and immature." But here we are. 

I look at purpose now differently because as much as I love my job, I don't feel this ever ending purpose of saving the world the way that I felt when I was doing my own thing, but I also think that it's okay and it's good for me. Life in blogging is a lot of extreme ups and downs and I didn't handle it well. I have to not just look at life through this rearview and say it was all good because I remember the lows as well. The purpose that I'm living now is just more steady, less drama, and just day to day 8-5. It's a really quiet season so therefore it feels lacking in purpose, because unfortunately our society (or maybe just me) has gotten so used to these extreme highs and LOOK WHAT I DID TO ACHIEVE MY PURPOSE TODAY! That does not mean that I don't live each day with passion because that is something I'm really huge on and I really do try really hard in every moment no matter what the task at hand is because I feel that's important and have valued for a long time.

There's purpose in every moment of every day if you choose to be purposeful, and it doesn't have to be this big extravagant thing. There is purpose in explaining to your children why they shouldn't do certain things so that they can grow up to be awesome adults. There is purpose in making dinner for your spouse because you are fostering that relationship with them. There is purpose in the paperwork that has to be done at your job because this leads you to be a good employee and steward of the job that has been afforded to you and what is helping you to pay your bills/do fun things/save for the future. I believe there is purpose in the vulnerability of this post to say "You know what? I made a choice that I have some regrets about" because that allows me to cultivate connections with those around me who might be afraid to say the same. There is purpose in literally every moment if you allow yourself to think that way. It's a shift and one that's worth taking.

Even if 98% of the people that I have appointments with now are there for their incentive check (and openly tell me this lol), there is purpose in the 2% of people that I can make a difference in their lives by showing them positive change through nutrition in their disease states and continue to show the 98% the benefit of doing so as well. 

I've also found that I find my purpose in my career, and I find purpose in my athletics, but those are not the things that we should find purpose in. That's what the world tells us to find purpose in, but those are not the things of eternity and rather just the purposes of this Earth. When I remember THOSE facts, I'm humbled. I realize that the purpose of eternity is just to rest and know that just as I am right now is purposeful enough, and that this isn't an never-achieved far reaching thing that none of us ever seem to achieve. I would venture to say that there are a few people that can say "I am living my #1 purpose driven life" but rather we all have this notion of "if I could just get to THIS point, then I would be satisfied." And that's a fallacy. 

{{Psalm 138:8 - The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your steadfast love, O Lord endures forever.}}

Every single moment in our lives in a decision of attitude. So today, in our 8-5's, in our after hour lives with our husbands and our wives and our daughters and our sons lives, let's make every single moment purposeful vs the never ending search for our purpose. 

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