This is not going to be about me, because people stopped saying that long ago to me. ;)
This is going to be about my mom and her most recent weight loss, and how defensive it makes me! :) First and foremost, I would like to say, my mother has eaten many cheeseburgers on her road to weight loss. She just chose lean beef vs 70/30 ground chuck. Or maybe "eat a doughnut" but well, she's ate those too. So, let me just dive in ...
When my mom started on her weight loss journey, just like everyone else, she had an arbitrary number in her head and I remember saying "Mom you are totally selling yourself short but it's whatever you are comfortable with." and I remember her saying "Well I'm just older now ... "
So, let's just go there. Why is there this rule that once you get older, you can't look the way that you did when you were younger? Who made that rule? Because if we are talking about things from a health perspective, I think that's an incredible goal to have (unless of course you are obsessive over changes that just naturally occur but that's not my point here). We have these thoughts that are pounded into our head from an early age that once you reach this certain point, you can no longer be fit or then you're obsessive, selfish and too skinny.
I would just like to say that my mom feels better than she has in a long long time. My mom eats a caloric intake that is great for her but also a calorie deficit that allows her to continue to lose weight. She is energized, satisfied, and non obsessive. She goes out to eat all the time, she has gone on a vacation with family, she went on a trip with her girlfriends, and she has done this all while continuing to reach her goals. She only weighs like once per week and when she does if it hasn't gone down, she's smart enough to know that it might not this week but it probably will the next.
I asked her how she dealt with the obsession over the scale just because I love to hear her thoughts. If you didn't know already, my mom has a REALLY good relationship with food. She has one that most women would dream of. She genuinely said that she just doesn't think about it the rest of the day. It's not hard for her, but she just doesn't even think about it. It's just a marker of what she's been doing and from that point, who cares?
If she has a craving, she fills it within her macros for the day. She has gotten comments that her legs are tiny. Her legs have ALWAYS been tiny. My legs are tiny. We have bird bones but her bones are strong. She has eaten more ice cream on her "diet" then she has ever in her life but that's because she's just tracking the carbs and prioritizes her froyo cone over other things.
I get defensive because she is getting comments now like "You are just maintaining now right? You don't want to lose anymore right?" I hate to say it, but are people jealous? I don't get these statements. If she is eating plenty of food (which she is), if she's living a healthy lifestyle (which she is), if she's came off her blood pressure medication and stayed off (which she has), then how in the world do people think it's a negative thing that she has lost weight and if she continues?
She has consistently lost one pound her week since she started, and she carries the weight in her midsection. So, quite frankly, if she wants to lose 10 more, I still think she would look awesome. I'm not saying she needs to lose 10 more because she doesn't, but I'm just saying I don't understand the mindset that so many have. Everyone seems to never be able to break out of the diet or off the diet. There's no in between. But, I'm telling you that we have found the in between. She listens to her body. If she's not counting then she stops when she's full. I can assure everyone that she is healthier than MANY women her age. She laughs at me, but I will continue to push her instead of the way that society does which is "Oh just be complacent. Don't worry about goals. You're too skinny. Stop!"
She used to make ugly faces in the dressing room mirrors and now she dances around (she's adorable). So, as usual, I feel I'm making a blog to defend someone who has been put down for the fact that they want to take care of themselves. Maybe one day this will change, but for now, I'll keep defending health. It always baffles me that someone will tell someone to eat more because they are getting too skinny and don't need to lose anymore, but you certainly don't see me telling them to put down the milkshakes. HAVE. MERCY.