Where's Waldo?

Hi friends. 

I'm alive.

And well. 

It's been a while, and it wasn't really purposeful other than in late January, I was a bit annoyed with social media and decided to take a break and naturally that led me to actually *gasp* forget to blog. Blogging was my habit for so long. I know people set goals for how many times they will blog. They set out calendars of topics. That was never me. I woke up every morning and wrote what was on my mind. Good, bad, and the ugly. When I began to draw back from blogging, I had to actually force myself from blogging. I would like crave it. I wanted to share my opinions, dang it. I wanted to spam you with ALL THIS KNOWLEDGE (jkjk). I felt it was a needed space. And it was, but then again it wasn't. 

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Every day, I learn something new about this world and my place in it. I've dissolved myself less in the amount of words that I provide to the internet which has become so saturated, but rather in the thoughts of others - across all spaces. I've read a lot (have I mentioned that enough? I feel it's obnoxious but it's about like telling you I went for a run - I'm still gonna keep telling you when I do HA). I have realized how many other thought patterns on life, love, health, happiness, religion, philosophy, and nutrition then I could have ever imagined. 

I think this is my conclusion in every space. If someone says they 100% have it figured out, then they don't. Y'all, I literally laugh when I see someone produce a WALL of text on facebook about some political topic as if they have it figured out. Like I literally L-O-L. I'm just like "oh thank you for bestowing us with your wisdom. I totally am convinced now." Because whether it's philosophy or nutrition, exercise or parenting, everyone is going to have an opinion that is based on the culture they were raised in, their parents, their peers, their stigma, their trauma, their body, their intelligence...on and on and on. I get overwhelmed by this, and not in a bad way (well sometimes). Like, a really beautiful way. Like wow, life is just...so much. And I used to find the words so easy to come by and now I think too much. I find myself grappling how to explain what I feel on anything...like literally anything because if I go down one path, I find myself back tracking because of something else I've read/researched that makes me think that they also have a valid point in whatever space that they are discussing this. 

We live in the information age, and I've decided to soak that up. I don't want to be blissfully ignorant. I want to know who, what, when, where, and how. I want to EXPERIENCE life. I want to be apart of it and not on social - absolutely not on social - but like actually feeling grass beneath my feet and a calling in my heart and a purpose and drive that awakens my soul. 

So, what I'm trying to tell you is that I've become a hippy. 

But I'm like a really anxious hippy that hasn't quite figured out the namaste. Ya feel me?

I'm really lucky in that I think my husband is a fully formed chameleon (I had to google how to spell that). He's just like "WHAT GRAND PLAN DOES KATIE HAVE FOR US TODAY?" and just goes along with it! ;) No, but really. He is a really good listener, and so he is able to really see my vantage point on a lot of things and so we discuss a lot of things, like every day, in every way, and if anyone else lived in our household, they might actually go crazy. Shall we talk about North Korea or Ghandi today, mountain biking or plant based eating, buying nice quality things or selling it all and living out of a van? Racism? Gender inequality? Taylor Swift? MY NEW OBSESSION WITH REESE WITHERSPOON AND OPRAH? Let's discuss the research and the podcasts and the books...

(Let me interject here to say that my husband is a really good listening chameleon that then wants to FIX ME and I'm like "Can you not?" That's been an area he's been working on - the fixing - I tell him I'm flawless and don't need fixing and he's like 'but you just cried yesterday about this very thing and now you're over it?' and I'm like 'DUH. that's how this works' -- okay moving on but you needed to know he's not hot and perfect ;) hehehehehe)

 okay he is. he's perfect okay. jk i'm biased.

okay he is. he's perfect okay. jk i'm biased.

Do you get where I'm going with this? Probably not. Because I don't either. And that's part of the reason that I haven't blogged. I couldn't just come here with some FIVE FAVORITES FOR FRIDAY post after being gone for months. I couldn't formulate my opinions on just about anything because I see everyone's point on everything. It's like obnoxious what my brain does. But because I have like zero opinions anymore, there's not much to say. HA! I feel like if I was to give you advice, I'd follow it up with bullet points 1-5 on why other things would work for you as well dependent on your personality type and the culture that you were raised in. You know I saw a diet based on personality types the other day and IT TOTALLY MADE SENSE!! Introverts tend to be more empathetic and are more successful with plant based/vegan/vegetarian diets as they easily align themselves with the suffering of humans/animals due to meat consumption. I was shook. 

But maybe you see where I'm going. There is science out there for us to make our best estimations on what we feel is appropriate, but you can find a study on anything that you want to prove a point on. That's called confirmation bias and we do it in politics EVERY SINGLE DAY. We also believe what we want to believe and see, so while I want to provide people with what works for me and such, I also think that you may feel completely different and I don't want to take that away from you either. 

Does that mean that I don't know who I am? Well, I used to think that when I began this journey like 1.5 years ago? Girl, please. I'm so over that. It only took about 10 books of "The subtle art of not giving a f**", You're not that great, You're a badass, Ego is the enemy, blah-dy, blah. I'm over it. I just think it took me a while to realize that there was more to the world than the bubble that I had grown up in and only exposed myself to, and that confused me for quite some time. I'd get over it, then I'd start down the path all over again. 

Oh yea, and I got injured a few times so then my endurance was shot. I wish I cared, but I was in a space where I was just like man bump this, I'm taking a break so for about 6 weeks I didn't do much of anything. It was nice. I felt like a slug or a sloth or even...A NORMAL HUMAN BEING! ;) I keep getting DM's asking me if I'm still running. ha! Yeppp, I sure do. I know you're like waiting for me to drop the knowledge of what I'm doing for nutrition and workouts now, but I think that part of my elusive mystery of what I've got going on right now. Does Katie still run? Or does she not? HAHAHA! I just really don't even care enough to go into those details right now so can I just rant about life instead? K, cool. 

But let me interject this information to you. I'm sure you've all heard of Ben Greenfield, and he's one of those guys that if he tells me about some information, I'm pretty hype to believe it because I know he does his due diligence. He's all about some minimalist endurance training to be able to enjoy other things in life, and I'm like...HERE.FOR.IT. 

Basically in endurance training, other than pure enjoyment, the goal of the training sessions is to get you prepared for race day but scientifically increased endurance can mean: 

-increasing your heart rate, stroke volume, increasing your V02max, changing the density of your mitochondria (energy powerhouse)

Ultimately, you want oxygen to be delivered to your muscle cells efficiently and when you are more in shape more quickly and then how much that oxygen is being utilized from the muscles before it's sent back to the heart. 

You can do that in the traditional sense by the normal programming of altering between tempo days, speed workout days, and longer days in certain heart rates doing the craft that you love and enjoying it. But sometimes, ironman athletes don't have 20 hours per week to devote to their craft. I am like ALL ABOUT time management and being able to do all sorts of things. I'm not going to give all the details because this could be a full post, but just that you can do HIIT workouts throughout the week, one hour workouts on normal days and then one to two 2-4 hour sessions on the weekends and build the exact same density of mitochondria giving you the same results without all the burn out, exhaustion, and low recovery. YASSSS. PRAISE BE. 

And to be fair, another way you can do this is through doping (exogenous epoetin) but I'm going to guess you guys probably won't need to go that route! ;) I joke that I'd totally dope if it was you know...moral and legal. But it's not, so I digress. lol. 

I just wanted to come on here and let you know that I'm doing really well, specifically like this week has been like really good. I also bought a mountain bike yesterday because Tanner and I have found these new outdoor hobbies together and we want to hike and camp and explore all summer and I'm just so pumped. I can't wait.

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I'm taking the NASM CPT test soon - as in I haven't really studied and I need to do that because you only get 6 months but after pharmacy school and years in this biz, I feel like I already knew everything when I read the book just being honest. I'm NEVER confident in test taking..literally ever. I was ALWAYS ALWAYS the kid that has to study her brains off, but for the first time I'm like .. just chill. And it feels so badass. Like I almost want to walk into the test with sunglasses on. And then I'll probably fail. 

And can I just say how uncomfortable that last paragraph made me? Isn't it pathetic that we can't compliment ourselves without feeling like the entire world is going to judge us and think we are arrogant. Sheesh. So I'm actually really not very smart. Okay, I feel balanced now. 

LOVE AND PEACE AND ALL THE CHANGING WORLDS THAT IS KATIE. 

I almost type "that is katiesfitscript" but I'm really past that. Like really. Like, I'm fairly certain I'm going to reroute this blog URL, but we shall see. I'll probably change my mind 5000x before I would do that, then I'd do it, then I'd regret it. hahaha. I mean it's catchy but if one more person calls me "Katie fit" or "Katie script" in person, I might like actually sucker punch them. KATIESFITSCRIPT. WITH AN S AFTER KATIE. FOLLOWED BY FIT. THEN SCRIPT. 

Okay, I've been way too catty on this post. I'm still kind, I promise. Like, honestly, I feel really less judge-y these days and it feels good. Those were hard habits to work on.

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